The nurse looked away.
Then came the words I was not prepared to hear.
Both of my newborn twins had Down syndrome.
I felt the room tilt around me.
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My husband said nothing. My mother started crying. The doctor kept speaking, explaining things I barely understood, but all I could hear was one terrifying thought repeating in my head:
I can’t do this.
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I was scared.
Scared of the future. Scared of the responsibility. Scared that my entire life had changed in a single breath.
And before anyone could stop me, I made a decision I would regret almost immediately.
I signed the papers.
I told them I couldn’t take the babies home.
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Then I walked out of the hospital.
I still remember the sound of their cries behind me as I moved down the hallway.