My husband became an organ donor as his final wish — after he d*ed, his doctor stopped me and said, “There’s something he made me promise to give you only after he was gone.”

I told myself a lot of things that weren’t true.

What I actually did was nothing.

I stayed away.

I let myself believe it was easier for everyone.*

*His name is Daniel.

He is five years old.

I have never met him.*

*I found out six weeks ago that Diane is sick.

Not the way I am sick — she may recover.

But she has no family nearby, and Daniel has no one else.

I have been trying to figure out how to tell you.

I kept starting and stopping.

I was ashamed.

I am ashamed.*

*I am not asking you to raise him.

I am not asking you to forgive me right away.

I am asking you to make sure he is not alone.

Whatever that looks like.

Whatever you can manage.